Happy Tuesday Thrivers!
What is a self development mindset? It’s having the mindset of knowing that you gain something from every experience in your life. I have recently been feeling extremely awakened. Although I’ve had my fair share of low moments and going through a roller coaster of emotions, I have been feeling very grateful. I think a lot of it has to do with the recent transition in my career as I embark on a new beginning but more so the realization that has come during this process. I realized it’s important to have a self development mindset when you go through the ups and downs in life. Why? Because your self development mindset will teach you to be grateful for all the good even in those low moments.
Being the first in my family (along with my sister) to graduate with my Bachelors Degree and Masters Degree (we graduated the same time)- I felt I had a big responsibility on my shoulders to make a name for myself. I’m sure many kids of immigrant parents can understand this feeling. We make career choices in part to make our parents proud. Sometimes we may not choose the path our parents want for us but the pressure is definitely there to make it.
I busted my ass for 6 years to be able to achieve these degrees, to make something of myself. At the time I felt like I was pursuing a field I knew I would be in love with and slowly I realized I honestly didn’t know what I was doing. Do any of us in our 20s know exactly what we want to do with our life? Long story short I felt stuck for several years hopping from one job to the next trying to get my foot into the business industry. Looking back I now realize that all those jobs helped my build the skillset and experience that I needed to get to this point.
During the summer of 2019 I had told myself that I had certain goals. My main goal was to move out of my parents and gain my own freedom. In order to do that I needed to get a better job. I attained those goals in the matter of a few short months. But the lessons that followed were much greater. I was running after something the wrong way. Those months when I was on my own with my new job were probably some of the toughest months of my life. I gained the freedom I was looking for but I was dealing with a lot of toxicity at my workplace and in my love life. It was damaging for me. My relationships with my family were extremely strained.
Fast forward several months. I moved back into my parents and worked on my relationships at home. I worked on my relationships developing healthy loving relationships with my friends. I worked on my mindset, on my health, on going back to the things I loved doing and picking up new hobbies. The most important thing was working on being grateful for my everyday and making the absolute best of my situation at home even though I initially felt like I took three steps back.
This whole fairytale story I had built up of being on my own was a lie and story that I sold myself. The most important thing that I can share with you is that the grass will always be greener where you water it. If you work on every aspect of yourself and the life you want by shifting your perspective, you will achieve the very thing you’re looking for – happiness. Happiness is not a destination – you don’t achieve it when you get to the goal weight you want, you don’t achieve happiness at the right job, and you don’t achieve happiness once you’ve got all your goals checked off. Happiness is a state of mind. You achieve it when you push yourself during your intense HIIT cardio workout (maybe a little later when the endorphins kick in), you achieve it when you forget about the future and the past and just take in everything as it is right now and count all your blessings. You achieve happiness when you smile at everything you do have and how far you’ve come.
I am finally at a great place in my life not because of any major achievements but because I choose to be happy in spite of not having achieved all of those things. I have had the opportunity to make memories with loved ones, I have had the opportunity to laugh until my stomach hurts, and to watch Netflix with my brother on a weekday after a long day of work.
So work on the little moments that make you happy NOW!! The most important thing you have is time so be happy NOW! Water the grass right where you are and watch how your life magically transforms!
Take care Thrivers!